The strength of any family is tested in hard times. In your life together, you and your partner will conquer various proverbial hills, but none as steep and treacherous as moving homes. Yes, moving into a new place is a fact of life, like starting a job, going to school, and some more unpleasant things like getting sick. But, while most other turmoils you will have to go through will leave your partnership more robust to outside threats, moving homes is a different story.
What happens when we move homes
A recent Fantastic Services survey has shown that 20% of people who had moved into a new household went through an argument with their partner. Moreover, about 55% retained some unresolved anger after the move, and 6% even went as far as splitting up. Those are huge numbers when we consider that only 6% of people have never moved homes, and most of them are on the younger side – 18 to 34 years old. Only 3% of people aged 35-54 and 4% of those 55+ have never moved homes, while 14% of the younger generations still live in the same place they always did.
The sad truth is that almost everyone considers moving homes a highly stressful event. This stress affects our judgement and communication, as people tend to forget it’s all for the better. Still, there is way too much work to be done before people can establish themselves in their new homes. But settling in is not what causes the most stress. Leaving the old one is what really grinds people’s gears.
Why do we argue when moving homes?
According to the survey, the most significant stress generator when moving homes is the need to sort, choose and pack the belongings you will take to your new place. This causes stress to over 70% of all respondents. It’s hard to imagine throwing away some memory-rich items, despite not using them for a decade. Usually, that’s the main reason for argument as well, as nearly 80% of people who start an argument over moving homes admit that this is their breaking point. Age doesn’t play a significant role in this aspect of moving, as all age groups are around the average. However, the gender of the mover is what truly matters.
While male respondents claim they argue over moving their belongings in 70% of cases, which is a significant number, when it comes to the female respondent, this number is 91%. Nine out of ten women will start an argument, which is quite in line with the female gentle and more emotionally mature profile. Women tend to add value to objects based on their memories. While men do the same thing, they tend to do it far less often, meaning they have far fewer objects with sentimental value. This phenomenon can be witnessed most effortlessly with how some women give pet names to their or the family’s car. Men do that far less frequently.
While moving one’s belongings from the old and the new place is the biggest breaking point, it’s by far not the only contributor to overall stress.
What else tests our relationship?
According to Fantastic Services’ survey, about 70% of people stress about how they will pack and move their belongings. While choosing what to bring along is definitely a big question, it can’t end up costing you money. Still, only about 56% are concerned about whether their belongings will reach undamaged in their new home. 46%, on the other hand, are worried they might damage the home they are leaving, and another 47% do the same, only for the home they are moving into.
These problems are easily resolved by hiring a good removals company, which not only does all the work for you but also insure your belongings in case of damages. Naturally, more people (51%) stress over choosing the correct removals service provider than those who consider damaging their old or new home a risk.
While those numbers show a pretty clear picture that many factors contribute to the overall stress, one significant part of moving homes is missing – preparing the house for those who will occupy it next.
Can cleaning before moving out destroy your family?
Cleaning at the end of your tenancy is very important if you are moving out of your own property, regardless of whether you will sell it or rent it out. However, if you are moving away from a rental residence, end-of-tenancy cleaning is a must. Your deposit relies on leaving the place just as good as you found it, so scrubbing the floors, washing the walls, windows, carpets and furniture, as well as deep cleaning your white appliances and bathroom is a must. As you already know, that’s not something anyone is looking forward to, so stress levels are highly elevated whenever it comes to this part.
Typically, when moving in, you pay a deposit, ensuring the owners will get the apartment in the same condition as they leased it to you. Deposits can go as high as several thousand dollars, as the standard is 2-3 monthly rents. But, as you might have guessed, landlords are not too eager to give back that money, and many court cases can go either way if you haven’t cleaned up after yourself.
In all honesty, this is a major choir that could take up to several days, and both men and women despise it equally. Still, no matter how much both work, the stress is high. Thus, arguments are unavoidable.
So what can you do?
How to avoid arguing over the end-of-tenancy cleaning?
There are several ways to avoid this position. One solution to the problem is to strictly separate the work based on how much time it will take you to clean a particular segment that needs your attention. This way, you will equally contribute, and if both of you do an outstanding job, chances are this experience will make you into an even stronger couple. Still, in case the landlord finds some reason to ask for part of the deposit, this will raise tension and doubt in the family whether the one who cleaned this segment was not faking his efforts. Distrusting your partner is a slippery slope, and arguing over it is almost guaranteed.
Even if you ask friends and family to help with the cleaning, the end solution might be the same – ruining your relationship over someone else’s apartment.
A better solution, of course, is to hire an End-Of-Tenancy cleaning crew. The professional cleaning team has the equipment and know-how to clean the home you are moving away from quickly, efficiently, and without you lifting a finger. Moreover, they know all of the landlord’s tricks, so they know where to clean and how to make the apartment look outstanding.
Of course, such services will cost a bit extra on top, but the benefits are enormous. Firstly, you will get back your deposit entirely, which means that despite paying 200-300 pounds for a cleaning service, you will get 2000-3000 pounds back. Secondly, trusting professionals will completely nullify any chances of damaging furniture, carpets or walls in the attempt to clean them. Most importantly, you will benefit from retaining good relations with friends, family, and, most importantly, your significant other.
So, is your family strong enough to move homes?
You can never know until you try. And chances are, sooner or later, you will try. Still, instead of waiting to find out, it’s better to prepare some emotional energy, a bit of extra money and a lot of patience if you want your family to survive the move. And remember that your family’s happiness is not worth the small amounts you will pay to professionals to do the job for you and relieve you of the responsibility and stress.